He's Home

Whenever someone tells me to go to my "happy place", this is the where I will go.  This day.

Last Thoughts

I have thought long and hard about what I wanted to say for this last post.  I think I said it all in my last email to Hayden.  So...I will share that.



"Yep, if this email were a dessert, it would be super sweet, mushy, gooshy and you'd cry tears because it's so good.  Get ready...

For two years I have thought about this email...what I wanted to say, what it would feel like, what your emotions would be.  Now that it is here, I'm kinda baffled about what to convey.  I'll do my best.

After you left, a part of me was missing.  It constantly felt like I had misplaced something, left something behind, lost a favorite something.  I couldn't make peace with those feelings.  I would cry every time I even saw missionaries, anywhere.  I would cry.  A lot.  I knew in order to get through two years of your absence, I would have to do change my mindset.  I prayed about what to do.  Heavenly Father reminded me to stay busy.  So I did.  It helped to keep my hands busy.  It distracted my head and my heart.  Mostly.  If I am being completely honest, (and what's the point if I'm not?), then I will tell you that I have never missed a human being more.  I have literally carried you with me every single day, like a pocket watch that one gets out and checks the time frequently.  That was me.  I'd pull memories of you out multiple times a day and "check" you.  

Then the growing came.  I could tell Heavenly Father was molding you, shaping you into the missionary He knew you could be.  My heart exploded with love, admiration and (remember I am being honest), pride.  

Your six month mark came and I was still having dreams that you'd be home when I woke up.  I had been in your room several times, but not for long.  It still hurt too much.  Time passed and I still kept you in my heart, "checking" on you several times a day.  Then a year!!  Each of your emails kept us going.  They were read too many times to count.  And your pictures were like getting a favorite dessert to eat while the Jazz win the NBA title. Yeah, that good!!

Now, here we are anticipating your homecoming.  I know you have changed in many ways.  A Mother can see changes in her children that many others cannot.  I see it in your testimony, your stature, your countenance. I can't wait to see it all in person.  I know you will transition into life after mission.  I know you are ready to use all you have learned.  I am here for you.  I will listen to every last story you want to share.  I have a billion questions for you, I'm sure.

Please tell the people who surround you of my gratitude for them.  Let them know how I have prayed for Heavenly Father to pour out blessings upon them because of their kindness to you.  I love them and will forever be grateful for all they did for you.  I only hope to meet them someday.

Hayden, I'll never be able to tell you the depth of admiration and complete awe I have for you and the mission you have served.  You have done it!  I cannot imagine how proud your Heavenly Father is.  I KNOW how proud I am.

It has been a privilege typing you each week.  I have felt blessings in our lives from your service.  Thank you. Thank you for representing the Lord, our church, our ward, our neighborhood, our family and me.  I lived your mission through you.  I hope I can live it for real someday.

I have tried to say I love you in each email I sent.  This one is no exception.  I love you.  Always.

Mom

P.S.  We won't be hard to find at the airport.  I'll be the crazy woman being restrained by security. I'm kidding...kinda." 

  

Last P-Day

It's Hayden's last P-day.  This is the last email he will type as a missionary.  In the next post, I will share my last email to him.  For now, here he is...

"Hey everybody and anybody that still reads this thing.

This is my last email as a missionary. It`s kind of a crazy thing to think about. I can`t believe how quickly it went by. I`m pretty sad to be leaving, but also excited to be home. It`s gonna be insane seeing how much everyone and everything has changed!

I LOVE Chile and its people. I know that my call here was inspired! 

Thanks for all the support.

I know that God lives. I know that He answers our prayers and that Christ really did do everything possible for us. When we are at our weakest, Christ has already felt that and is ready to strengthen us. I know that obedience brings blessings. I know that the gospel is restored. I have seen and lived things out here that have helped me gain a testimony. I think that`s the whole reason God asks us to serve missions...to become converted ourselves!

Love you All!

Elder Clegg

See ya NEXT WEEK." 

Ready for Whatever

I feel like over the course of the last few weeks, Hayden has made peace with the fact that his mission is coming to an end.  In his email this week I learned:

1.  He is wanting to get to a Cafe Rio as soon as possible.

2.  He is giving most of his stuff away.  (Perfectly fine with me!)

3.  He's bringing souvenirs.

4.  He's "ready for whatever"!

This gives me peace.  I know he has gained valuable skills that will serve him the rest of his life.  I know he is ready for whatever.    

                                    

All Teared Up

My kids will tell you my tears have come easily over the past two years.  I get teared up whenever I see missionaries, go to the airport, read Hayden's emails, update this blog, go in his room or even think of him. I have to be careful.  Early on, I had a meltdown in Wal-Mart as I read one of his first emails out of the MTC. No tear gas needed!

Here's Hayden getting teared up...

"Well.. I got teared up because my comp and I got drilled by tear gas when some students started doing a protest in the city. Haha so that was fun. I couldn´t stop crying for like 4 hours. Haha 

Also teared up because I only have 3 weeks left. Where does the time go?  

Also teared up, because we baptized Claudia and she´s a saint! I´ll send pictures next week! 

Love,

Elder Clegg"

I'll Go. I'll Say. I'll Be.

As Hayden's mission days are coming to a close, I find myself at a lack of words to describe all the

feelings in my heart.  I just can't even begin.  But...someone named Mary Brown was able to capture

part of what I have been feeling about Hayden.  

1. I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go
2. 
   

   1. 1. It may not be on the mountain height
      Or over the stormy sea,
      It may not be at the battle's front
      My Lord will have need of me.
      But if, by a still, small voice he calls
      To paths that I do not know,
      I'll answer, dear Lord, with my hand in thine:
      I'll go where you want me to go.
   2. (Chorus)
      I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord,
      Over mountain or plain or sea;
      I'll say what you want me to say, dear Lord;
      I'll be what you want me to be.
   3. 2. Perhaps today there are loving words
      Which Jesus would have me speak;
      There may be now in the paths of sin
      Some wand'rer whom I should seek.
      O Savior, if thou wilt be my guide,
      Tho dark and rugged the way,
      My voice shall echo the message sweet:
      I'll say what you want me to say.
   4. 3. There's surely somewhere a lowly place
      In earth's harvest fields so wide
      Where I may labor through life's short day
      For Jesus, the Crucified.
      So trusting my all to thy tender care,
      And knowing thou lovest me,
      I'll do thy will with a heart sincere:
      I'll be what you want me to be.
   5. Text: Mary Brown, 1856-1918
      Music: Carrie E. Rounsefell, 1861-1930

   
   

"Hey Guys! 

It´s been a good couple of weeks. Super crazy, but good. 

We´ve been doing a ton of divisions with the whole mission. We go to the office in the mornings and generally take somebody to our sector to work with us in the night. It´s really fun to take people to our sector, because it´s pretty hood and the generally get pretty intimidated knocking the doors. 

I´ve been learning a ton from President Barreiros. He is such a good guy and it´s been a pretty neat experience to get to know him a lot better! 

We´re looking to baptize every week for my last 4 weeks. There´s a really cool lady named Claudia that has progressed a ton! She will be baptized later tonight. Jouriles speaks Portuguese, so we were able to teach him and baptize him in a language that we don´t even really speak! So that was a cool experience. E´Held speaks well, so he did the baptisimal prayer and he got baptized. 

The mission is great! 

Love you all,

Elder Clegg

Pics.. 

E´ Ballard peaced out this past week. It was sad to leave him in the airport! 

Jouriles.

I love going to Presidents house because it´s super pretty!"

Telemarketers

Recently I read somewhere that one of the women in the Church Auxiliary Presidencies uses telemarketing phone calls to her home as a means of sharing the gospel.  I was inspired by that, so I decided to give it a try!  Sure enough, one called and I didn't even let him get past "Hello".  I started talking faster than I ever thought I could.  I shared with him the Plan of Salvation.  I asked him if he knew who Jesus Christ was and he said "Yes".  (He was still on the line!)  I said some more stuff and then turned him over to the missionaries in his area.  Then I hung up.  My heart was going to explode. I was sweating and I felt like I had just done something amazing.  I could not wait to tell Hayden that I did some missionary work!  In my next email, I told him all about it.  I was sure he would tell me how proud he was of me!  Instead, he showed me up.  Read on...

"Haha that makes me laugh about the telemarketer thing, because I got the chance to do it this week as well! I´ve been wanting to do it a ton! I got the baptismal invite in on the phone!"

Yep!  He got the baptismal invite in on the phone!  I have a lot to learn about this technique.  Good thing Hayden will be home in a month and I can watch the pro in action!

PCCB

After we finished our Mother's Day Skype call with Hayden, I could tell he was struggling with wanting to come home.  He was so unsure of coming home and needing to make big decisions, as well as remembering how to live in the "real world".  In the mission, Hayden is sure of what he is doing every day.  His schedule is set, his routine in place and he is VERY comfortable.  So, I went to work.  I prayed that his heart would be able to remember some of the little things he loves about home.  Over the course of the last several emails, I can tell he is starting to remember.  The spirit is reminding him of those things that are "home" to him.  One of those is pumpkin chocolate chip bread.  He loves it!  Although pumpkin chocolate chip bread may seem like a small reminder of home, it is a big reminder to me that Heavenly Father answers prayers.

"I´m doing well down here! Just a crazy week! We did two divisions. I went to Talagante and 5 de Abril. It´s been cool to go back to all of my old zones and see the fruits that keep on giving. So many stories to tell! 

As an AP, no day is ever the same! We do a TON of classes and meetings and stuff. We drive quite a bit. We are with President way more than anyone else, but not too much either! We go to his house sometimes to plan. We travel a lot. We run errands. We work in our sector. It´s all pretty cool! 

I´m just getting pumped to eat Pumpkin chocolate chip bread. Haha!"

Busy Busy Busy

Our family loves Christmas movies!  One of my all time favorites is Frosty the Snowman.  Mike and I quote it all the time.  This clip (I sure hope it works) describes Hayden's time in his mission right now.  Time is winding down and he is trying to accomplish all he can.  I love that he is staying busy. I love that he is giving it all he has.  I love that I get to see his face in less than seven weeks!

"I´m tired as all get out, my body is dead, but I know that there are still a couple more people down here for me to find! Maybe you´d also find it cool that I have written on my desk, 'Be the type of missionary that your Mom thinks you are'. Haha that phrase has motivated me so much!"

Heavenly Father is in Charge

As Hayden has served his mission, I have seen Heavenly Father's hand manifested in so many ways.

In his growing up years, I can see that Hayden was given the opportunity to meet and become friends with a Haitian boy who was adopted into a loving family in our ward.  They shared life experiences and it made Hayden a better person.  Fast forward to the moment on Hayden's mission when he was asked to help in the Haitian Branch in Santiago.  He instantly felt tender feelings for those beautiful people.

I can see the choice Hayden made early on to work with his special needs peers becoming a huge blessing in his life.  He took the peer tutoring classes and always came home inspired and touched by his time there.  In his senior year, Hayden chose to help with the special needs high school soccer team.  He practiced with them every day, he rode the bus to their games, and he traveled to Salt Lake to participate in their Special Olympics soccer tournament.  (I was blessed to attend this event with him.  I hold those memories close.)  Hayden shares a story this week about a special needs boy that reminded me again of how wonderful our Father in Heaven is.  His plan for our happiness is sure.


"Super good week! Haha I had a ton of fun! I ended up being able to go back and work in two of my old sectors...Diagonal and Nueva San Martin! The Lord put so many of the people that I knew in my way. I had probably the coolest experience of my mission in Diagonal. It was exactly a year since I left there!

We were walking on these ghetto streets going to meet up with some Elders, when all of a sudden this kid with some special needs comes up to me with his Mom...so we contacted them and I was like, "Hey have you talked with missionaries before..?"  Then the Mom starts to say, "Yeah we have...we always remember one that came through here.  He was so kind to Luciano one day."  (Her child with Down Syndrome.)  Then she just started crying when she read my name.  She said, "Clegg. We never thought you'd come back. It´s so good to see you. Luciano talks about you every day." Haha then I started crying when I realized that it was a little kid that I had gone out of my way to be nice to one day. I only talked to that kid once, but it´s so crazy how some of the little things we do will always be remembered by these people. 

Super good to see some of my converts like Danny!  (Picture below)

We worked super hard in our sector this week and found like 12 people in one day.  I bet that most of them will be baptized!  Super cool. We don´t have much time in our sector, but when we do.. I love it! 

Love all you guys...

Especially my MOMMY! 

Elder Clegg

P.S. We bought some super cool knock off Jordan Jumpsuits. These are what all of the Chilean gang bangers wear.  I love them!  Haha! 

Danny

Completos"

POD Squad

Last Friday, we were eating dinner together as a family.  Out of the blue, Mike says, "Nine weeks from today, we will see Hayden."  I had a moment where time stood still.  I can't quite comprehend being able to look my son in the eyes, to feel his presence and hear his stories.  It is something I haven't even allowed myself to daydream about because it is too painful.  But now...I catch myself daydreaming about that boy (man) ALL THE TIME!  Anxious isn't even a strong enough word to describe how we feel.  But oh, how grateful I am that he is getting to have these new experiences during the final, precious weeks of his mission!! 


"Hey guys! 

This week was crazy. Not really.. 

Monday: Meeting with President all day and then we went to the sector and found a girl that will be baptized for sure. 

Tuesday: Visited a couple zones and did some LD trainings. 

Wednesday: We went to the coast and did more trainings on the way. 

Thursday: Slept on a tile floor and did divisions with the ZLs in the coast. 

Friday: More Divisions

Saturday: More Divisions

That leads me to the title. Haha we were living out of a suitcase for the whole week and sleeping in sleeping bags. One night Elder Brooks rolls over and just yells, "I feel like a bean."  So it´s pretty logical that we now call ourselves the pod squad. Then it turned into the P.O.D. squad, which stands for Plannin' on Dunkin'. So basically we just had a long week and tried to make it fun. 

We´ll see if President sends the Pod Squad on divisions again this week. Don´t think so, so maybe we´re gonna go baptize. 

Love,

Elder Clegg"

Greenie Again

Hayden is learning so much right now and feels like he's starting over.  He is upbeat and happy with his new responsibilities.  He finally got to see the coast!  I love that he sent so many pictures this week!


"Hey Guys! 

This week was pretty crazy. Haha I got a new sector..  Hood for life. Haha it´s 80% Hatian and 20% scary. 

I´m now comps with Elder Brooks from Brigham City! We´re doing a White Wash into the office as AP´s.. Haha so we´ll hardly ever be in the sector. Elder Brooks and I are in charge of preparing new leaders for the new mission president, because President Barreiros ends with us in June. Elder Ballard and Elder Harries that I lived with are in charge of the office calls and stuff like that. 

My whole mission just changed, so we´ll see what happens! Haha 

We´re still gonna baptize a lot. 

My P-day is now Saturday! 

Talk to ya´ll later!
Elder Clegg

Baptism of Josefina

Maaawige of Josefina

Da Playa

Our truck...We don´t use it much...

Traveling with Elder Brooks"

There's An AP(P) For That

I woke up Monday morning, excited to hear from our missionary.  I was anxious to get the scoop on all the flooding that happened in Santiago last week.  This is what I found!  (He wrote a group email to Autumn, Aubrey and me.)  


"Hey Gals! 

I am probably not gonna be able to respond to you guys at all this week, because today isn´t my P-day. I am now gonna have my P-day on Saturdays because of being in the office. 

I got called as an AP with the assignment to train future leaders...so that will be interesting! I´m going to be ending my mission in Ochagavia. The same place I was 1 year ago. I´ll be driving a car and not really sure what else.  I´ll be traveling around the mission a lot. 

Love you guys!
Bubba"

I guess the flooding didn't stop the work.  Transfers still occurred and it looks like Hayden will have more opportunities to learn and grow!  And yes, my heart just about burst when I read the words "ending my mission..."  We cannot wait to see his face again!

So Many Miracles!

There is a definite learning curve to writing a missionary.  It took us some time to figure out how to get the most information out of Hayden.  I have learned each week to ask him two or three questions at the beginning of my email.  He then answers them in return.  Sometimes the questions are as simple as, "Did you get the package?".  One week I asked him when the last time was that he cried on his mission.  (It must have been a good thing to ask, because it was just that week he cried.)  This week I asked him the best and worst part of his week.  This was his reply.

Best part of my week was hearing the "still-wet-from-the-font-Alfredo" give his testimony about the Atonement. 

Worst part.. Well I didn´t really have anything bad happen. 

In his group email, he explains a little more about Alfredo.

"Alfredo was bapped. Super cool dude! He´s been waiting for a surgery for 5 years to restore full function because he´s partly paralyzed. He got mugged and was left pretty bad, but right after he passed his baptismal interview, he got a call saying that his operation would be this Tuesday! So many miracles. 

Josefina will be married and bapped this week. SO cool!

Love yall

Elder Clegg"

Sleepless in Santiago

As babies, all three of my kids had chronic ear infections.  This made for lots of tears and even more sleepless nights.  Hayden has had some sleepless nights this week.  He mentioned in his email to me that he had to do some visits to other missionaries during the night.  From the sound of things, I think I would rather deal with a fussy baby, than fussy missionaries.  Hang in there Hayden!


"Hey there! 

Thought I would pop a group email this week because lots of stuff happened. Haha it was a really crazy week. 

We got woken up in the night a few times to help some Elders, so it was a long week in the sleep department. 

We bapped Alina. She is great! We have 3 more lined up for the next two weeks. Miracles! Also, pray for Sandra. She is a single mom that we are trying to baptize this change. The ward is giving us all sorts of references. 

Speaking of the ward...we went to lunch in the most rich place ever. Haha Ferrari's and Rovers type of rich. It was on a private golf course and the food was SO good. 

Found a dog with rabies for the first time. Rabies is a real thing. Haha I didn´t think it ever happened. 

Conference was super sick.  I love Elder Renlund and President Uchtdorf! 

We had an interview type deal with like 10 other missionaries with the head of the Missionary Department and a 70.  It was really cool! 

That´s about all that came to mind.

Love you guys,

Elder Clegg"

Heroes

This week I asked Hayden who some of his mission heroes are.  This is his response.

"My mission heroes...people in the scriptures and/or people in the mission... 

President Barreiros. He is the coolest dude!  He has basically enabled me to have the exact mission I´ve wanted. 

Elder Johnson.  He was my first ZL and he really helped me to be a good missionary. 

Enos! I just love the chapter that he wrote. I relate to it so much!  Haha I feel like that was the exact thing that happened to me when I got out here on the mission.  The last verse is my favorite scripture. 

Peter!  He is just a beast."

Little does Hayden know, he has become a HERO to our family.  He has shown courage, done noble deeds and made the way easier for others to follow.  He has allowed himself to be a tool in God's hands to teach the joyful news of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  Any missionary who serves with their heart is a hero!

P.S.  Apparently being called a "beast" is a good thing these days.  I believe it means you are super good at what you do. 

20 to 0!

Hayden reminded me of something important this week. 

"The work is going very well. We have several women that are very close to baptism. One of them has her interview today.  NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER.  Haha we were knocking doors when she came out and I was just like...Oh crap, she just wants to talk to gringos!  But something told us to teach her and she is changing her life so fast.  She went from smoking 20 cigarettes every day to 0.  She is the best!"

President Uchtdorf's words come to my mind when I think of judging others.  He reminds us, 

"This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following:

Stop it!

It’s that simple. We simply have to stop judging others and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love for God and His children. God is our Father. We are His children. We are all brothers and sisters."

Swing and a Miss

So...this past week, my email didn't go through to Hayden.  This has happened before to other family members, but not to me.  I guess in Hayden's book, that means he is off the hook to respond. (Stinker!)  I only got two old pictures and one line telling me that he didn't get an email from me. Who, me...resentful?  Couldn't be!!  Actually, I am glad he is focused on the work and not worried about his Madre. Also, there was no group email, so I will share the old pictures and hope that technology is on my side next week!!

As Is

Transfers occurred this week and Hayden gets to stay "as is".  He will carry on the work with Elder Peterson (L) and Elder McDermott (R).

"Buena! 

Haha it was a good week. We got some great news on the changes.  That means that I´m gonna be staying in Talagante for another change.  My comps didn´t change either, but it´s good news, because trios are awesome and Talagante is sick! 

We bapped Antonia.  She´s a cute little girl!  She´s part of La Familia Gutierrez that is really big and we´ve been working to reactivate them.  Constanza is also part of that family.  She got baptized a couple weeks ago.  Easiest baptism of my whole mission. It was basically a Ward Baptism, but hey...blessings! 

This week nothing all that funny happened.  I also am not a fan of sharing super spiritual stuff over the internet, so we´re gonna make it real short this week. 

Love ya´ll 

Elder Clegg"